Transcript
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Welcome to the Clinician Researcher podcast, where academic clinicians learn the skills
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to build their own research program, whether or not they have a mentor.
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As clinicians, we spend a decade or more as trainees learning to take care of patients.
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When we finally start our careers, we want to build research programs, but then we find
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that our years of clinical training did not adequately prepare us to lead our research
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program.
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Through no fault of our own, we struggle to find mentors, and when we can't, we quit.
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However, clinicians hold the keys to the greatest research breakthroughs.
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For this reason, the Clinician Researcher podcast exists to give academic clinicians
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the tools to build their own research program, whether or not they have a mentor.
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Now introducing your host, Toyosi Onwuemene.
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Welcome to the Clinician Researcher podcast.
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I'm your host, Toyosi Onwuemene, and it is such a privilege to be talking with you today.
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Thank you for taking the time to tune in and to listen.
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I keep talking because you keep listening, and I want to thank you that you would create
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space for me to share my views and my thoughts with you.
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And so thank you.
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Thank you for listening.
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I want to invite you, if you have time available, on Monday, November 20th at 6 p.m., I'll be
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talking about five key, five critical steps in the transition from clinician to research
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leader.
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You don't want to miss it.
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You should show up there.
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Use information on the podcast website, clinicianresearcherpodcast.com.
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The banner will give you information.
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Or you can go to our website, coedcoach.com, and look for events.
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And in case you miss it, there will be another webinar, and I will continue to do things
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and share things that will help you make your transition.
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And I want to thank you for letting me help you do that.
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If you are not going to be available, you can still sign up, and that means that you
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will get the recording once it becomes available.
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So please sign up and learn all that I want to share about making that transition, which
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is critical.
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Okay.
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Today, I'm talking about the gift of a research career.
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And I really want to, you know, talk first about how my life has changed since I made
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the transition from being a full-time clinician to leading a research program.
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I will tell you that I've always had the dream of leading a research program, but I didn't
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know how.
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I didn't understand what was necessary.
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I had no idea about the structures that needed to be created to support your research and
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your writing, I had no idea about how to write a research question, how to think about a
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research question, how to even answer a research question.
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And I think I was completely confused every time I would submit a grant and get all this
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awful feedback.
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And I kept thinking, why is this not working?
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But it was what I wanted to do.
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The real of the pursuit was really because I had this dream of research just being my
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life, being my experience.
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So I may come across potentially as extroverted on the podcast, but I really love to be by
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myself.
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Give me a book and give me eight hours.
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I will like curl up in a corner and just read, read, read, read, read.
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At least that's what I did when I was younger.
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And even now as an adult, my happy place is sitting and writing and thinking big thoughts
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and synthesizing information and synthesizing data.
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It's what I've always enjoyed doing.
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And so research really allows me to do that.
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And so, but I didn't know that.
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I didn't recognize that that would be a gift in the research for me until I really started
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to make the transition.
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And the reason, so I want to share with you the gift of a research career is that many
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times are very focused on the challenges of the research career.
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Oh, I have to write another grant again.
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Or the grant was rejected.
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What?
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It's been four times.
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It's been submitted four times.
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There's a lot of frustrations.
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Don't get me wrong.
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I am not even here to take your frustrations away.
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But what I am here to do is to show you the gift.
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Just to show you the gift to look to because the moment you have a clear sense of the gift
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that you get from a particular endeavor that you undertake, it changes your experience.
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You're no longer, oh, I have to go through a slog.
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You're more really thinking about, okay, I just have to jump through four obstacles to
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get to the vision to get to my goal.
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Okay, I can do that.
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But the key is clarifying what your goal is.
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And that's why I want to share with you gifts, the gifts of leading a research career.
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And I want to share them with you so that you can focus on those gifts rather than focusing
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on the challenges because the challenges, again, they are just part of every endeavor.
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So I would like you to point out, point to one place in your life where you have not
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had any challenges.
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And if you can do that, then I will submit to you that perhaps you can have a research
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career without challenges.
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But if life is full of challenges, then I'm going to assure you that your research career
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will be full of challenges.
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But I don't want you to focus on the challenges because the challenges are just a free gift
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that comes with their research career.
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I want you today to focus on the gift.
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The very first gift I want to share with you is the gift of intellectual freedom.
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That is such a beautiful gift.
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The gift to think expansively, the gift to craft discourse, the gift to synthesize knowledge,
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the gift to write.
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It is the gift of intellectual freedom.
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No one has to tell you what to think.
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You don't even have to agree with all of the experts.
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You could be the one dissenting voice in the universe.
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And if you can write it eloquently enough, and if you can justify it well enough, and
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if you can cite enough literature, you can write it.
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Somebody will accept your publication.
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You will be that dissenting voice.
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It will be beautiful.
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To most of us, not dissenters, we are kind of mostly, you know, we're like, yes, this
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is what the literature says.
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I agree wholeheartedly.
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But then the literature is obviously never all in harmony.
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There is always, you know, there are always things that are different from what we consider
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to be dogma.
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So the gift of intellectual freedom is really freedom to think.
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Think in the way you want.
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Think in a way that enhances you.
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Think in a way that transforms you.
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And you know, it is freedom of thought.
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And sometimes people balk at that because they're like, well, you can't just think anything
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you want.
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And in reality, I will say that as clinicians, we do love science.
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I mean, science is what led us to patient care.
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We love patient care.
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We love to take care of the patient.
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We love to think critically about what it means to make things better.
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And so our intellectual freedom is about investigating that further and answering questions that
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benefit patients.
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So yes, I think that intellectual freedom for clinicians is a beautiful gift of a research
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career.
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And it really is.
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And I mean, it's the gift and the challenge, right?
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Because if people don't like your ideas, they may not want to fund them.
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But the most important person to like the ideas that come out of your mind is you.
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And if your intellectual abilities, if your intellectual freedom blesses you and you enjoy
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it, and you love it, you can be strategic and think about how to fund your continued
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intellectual freedom.
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So the first gift of a research career is your intellectual freedom.
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That may be for me the highest and most powerful gift that a research career has given me.
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That's number one.
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Number two is flexibility.
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Flexibility.
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The gift of a research career is flexibility.
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Now, the people who appreciate flexibility the most are people who have had to or have
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experience in flexibility in their careers.
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As an example, when I started in my faculty career, I was seeing patients five days a
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week.
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Yes, it was 80% time.
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I was 20% protected to do research.
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But somehow that math came down to five days a week.
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It was rough.
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I had a young child at home, another one on the way.
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Clinic started at 8 a.m. every day I was in clinic.
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Procedures because at the time I was, I staffed apheresis procedures.
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They started between 730 and 8 a.m. and you needed to be there to see the patient.
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I was literally always running out the door to make it through traffic so that I could
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start to see the patients.
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And then when the day ran long, I was literally there.
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Well, I can't say I was closing the door because the doors of the hospital actually never closed.
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But I was there late.
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So it was one of those things where, I mean, you know, I don't even have to say this.
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I'm preaching to the choir.
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When the patient shows up, you better be there.
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Like what is your excuse?
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The patient is in the room.
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Where are you?
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And so there's a kind of inflexibility with that.
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And the other piece of it is if the patient is crashing, do not tell me you have dinner
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reservations.
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It's the reality of patient care.
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And again, I'm preaching to the choir here.
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And so to be honest, even though that's so noble and so awesome, and we do love to be
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able to really give of ourselves in that way and really serve someone to where you're like
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you are crashing and I was there for you because I'm your doctor, I'm responsible, I will do
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this for you.
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It is a beautiful thing.
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I do not denigrate it.
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But it is also a challenging thing.
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Is a beautiful thing to be able to give your life in service of another.
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And it is also a challenging thing when you have to do it Monday through Friday, every,
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every week, month after month, it is challenging.
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And so one of the things, having come through that, having had that experience, one of the
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things that is a gift to me in my research career is flexibility.
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Now I said flexibility, I didn't say, oh, easy work, because being in research is actually
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pretty challenging.
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It's work in a different kind of way.
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It's not physically tasking, but it's very, very intellectually heavy and sometimes emotionally
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tasking as well.
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So you get up from a full day of working within your research program and you are tired.
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For me, it's good tired because I love the intellectual freedom that I get from the space.
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So when I say flexibility, I'm not saying easy work, but I am saying flexibility in
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the hard work that you do.
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That means there is no such thing as a crashing research experiment.
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Maybe two, three days of cell culture type work went to waste, you will do it again.
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But there's no emergency within your research program.
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And because of that, it gives you flexibility to work around your needs.
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And so, for example, today I had a child who had a recital.
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You know, ordinarily, I would not break my clinic.
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I will not even cancel or end the clinic early so I could be at a recital.
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It's just that the challenges of jumping through those hoops and then trying to reschedule
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patients who are moved is so big.
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Like the mere thought of it would cause me to shudder inside and I would be like, I will
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miss this recital because I don't want to have to deal with the fallout.
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But when it comes to my research program and I'm like, well, I pause meetings and I'm like,
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well, this paper, I'm coming back to you as soon as the recital is over.
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And it was such a beautiful thing to be able to get up, go do that, come back and keep
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the day going.
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It does mean that I was up later than I wanted to be, but I had the flexibility to do that.
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And that is one of the greatest gifts of my research career.
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And I will say, to be honest, it's right there, right up there next to intellectual freedom.
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And sometimes I'm not sure which is the more beautiful gift.
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The flexibility is so important.
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It's so powerful because having the flexibility allows you also to continue to pursue intellectual
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freedom in the way you want to, in the way you desire to.
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So intellectual freedom, number one, and then flexibility is number two.
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And then within flexibility is designing your work, right?
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Creating your own schedule, choosing your own schedule.
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And all of that falls within the flexibility piece.
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Number three, which these things are so, they're so high up there.
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It's like, is impact really number three?
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Impact is so, it's a close second to flexibility because the reason I came into medicine, I
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don't know about you, but the reason I came in was to make a difference.
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Because I look around and people are suffering and healthcare is just not where it could
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be and people are marginalized in our healthcare system and I want change.
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I want lives transformed.
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I want people changed.
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I want problems solved.
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I want diseases cured.
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It's my dream.
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It's the reason I came into medicine.
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And honestly, it didn't take me until the end of residency before I started to see that
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the way we're doing healthcare now is not the way that moves us forward in the direction
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I want to go.
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Part of that is recognizing the limitations of the data we have available.
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I'm a hematologist.
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Most of the stuff we quote, okay, we do have clinical trials, but we don't have the kind
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of clinical trials that like cardiology has, for example.
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So there's a lot, especially in my field of rare thrombotic disorders where we're looking
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through the case series and we're like, this is a case series of 16 patients.
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This is pretty phenomenal.
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For example, I presented a case conference today and I pulled out a paper that had 71
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patients and that was amazing.
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And so we know that there are limitations to the data that we cite to care for our patients
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and you're either going to settle and say, well, this is the way it is, or you're going
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to contribute to the data.
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You're going to contribute to the literature and that's what I want to do.
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I came for impact.
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I came for transformation.
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I came for impact.
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I came for transformation.
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And my research program gives me opportunity to do that.
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And so, you know, every time we submit a paper, not even that it gets published, but we submit
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a paper, we look at this paper and we say, this was good work we did.
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Oh my goodness, the satisfaction of that is amazing.
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Like we already know it's going to have a home.
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Yes, it may be, you know, three rejections away from its home, but we know it has a home.
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And when it's finally published, other than the relief that the publication finally was
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accepted, there is just the feeling of satisfaction that no matter how small, it is a contribution
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to the literature and it makes a difference in somebody else's life.
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And that is an unbelievable, wonderful thing to have as part of my career as a research
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leader.
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It is, you know, impact.
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You can get impact in seeing patients, but for me, what I was looking for was more than
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just, you know, the impact of seeing one patient after the other.
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I really wanted to be able to help a lot of patients.
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And so research is a vehicle by which I'm able to do that.
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The fourth thing, and again, these things are so amazing.
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They're so, so, so beneficial is mentorship.
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Oh my goodness, mentorship.
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I don't know about you, but one of my favorite parts of being a clinician is being a teacher.
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I love to see the next generation of physicians be transformed.
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I love to see it.
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I will tell you that my favorite thing to do clinically now is to work with residents
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and fellows.
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I love the joy and the enthusiasm that they bring.
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And they just remind me of how, you know, how I was when I was a young person, when
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everything was new and so exciting and so amazing.
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I'm not a cynical person today, but you know, a lot of that stuff has lost its novelty.
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It's like, yeah, I've seen it before.
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I've seen TTP respond to plasma exchange.
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It's a beautiful thing, but I've seen it before.
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They haven't seen it before.
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And it's just delightful to watch their joy and excitement.
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It really literally is like watching a little child and not in a derogatory way, but just
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in the excitement and the joy.
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Oh, it's such a powerful thing.
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And so mentorship is so important to me, not just because I get to help another clinician
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scientist on their journey or even a clinician in my role as a clinician, but because of
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how it changes me, because of how it humbles me, because of how it reminds me of all the
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things I still don't know.
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And it's okay.
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And because of all the brilliant sharp minds that surround me and challenge me to think
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differently or to make my thinking explicit, to lay it on the table and say, this is why
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I think the way I think, or to say, this is why I think this paper should take this shape.
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To be able to share that with another generation of physicians is incredible.
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And so your research career gives you the gift of being a mentor, because in being a
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mentor you're being transformed in the process.
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And it is unbelievable.
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Number five, and this definitely is not one of the top four, but it's a very important
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one too, is collaboration synergy.
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You know, I think I wanted to say collaboration, but then I added the synergy because it's
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not just the collaboration, it's the synergy that comes from collaboration.
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So the book that's on my mind right now that I need to share with you, it's called Who,
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Not How, The Formula to Achieve Bigger Goals Through Accelerating Teamwork.
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It's by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy.
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Great book, I totally recommend it.
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And I think it's so relevant to this conversation of collaboration synergy, because if you think
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about it, you are a master clinician in your own right, you have your field of expertise,
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you are good in this area.
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And what you're not so good at is other stuff.
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I'm a master hematologist.
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I'm good on the rare thrombotic disorders.
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But am I a cardiologist?
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No.
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Do I want to be?
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Definitely not.
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No disrespect to any cardiologist listening to me.
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I think cardiology is a great field, just not for me.
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But many of the things that I do are relevant to cardiology.
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For example, I'm particularly interested in thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura, TTP,
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and it presents sometimes as myocardial infarction.
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That's a cardiology problem.
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But I'm a hematologist treating a hematologic disorder, and I need a cardiologist on my
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team as my partner working with me.
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And so I bring my hematology, hemostasis thrombosis brain, and my cardiology partner brings their
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heart amazingness.
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And we come together.
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Oh, the synergy of that is beautiful.
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I don't have to learn more cardiology.
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I don't need to go back to fellowship, shudder, shudder.
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Oh, real shudder.
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I don't have to go back and do another residency or a fellowship in cardiology.
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I don't have to do that.
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But I can connect with my cardiology colleague, and we can make amazing things happen in our
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research program, as I think critically about the hemostasis thrombosis issues, and they
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think critically about cardiology issues.
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The synergy is beautiful.
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I enjoy that.
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Just two minds coming together and just, oh my gosh, it's so beautiful.
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Mm-hmm.
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It's amazing.
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And that's when you leave where you're trying to do everything by yourself, because being
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a research leader is definitely not about doing all things by yourself.
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It's definitely about doing as little as possible by yourself and really resourcing teams to
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support you to do that.
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That sounds like business.
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Yes.
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Yes, it kind of is like business.
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And the most beautiful things in business relationships are just when you can partner
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with another partner.
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The synergy is really amazing.
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So that's number five, collaboration, synergy.
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And I can't separate the two because it's so beautiful.
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They can't be separated.
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Okay.
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Number six is big picture thinking.
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Oh, I love when I sit down and I think about the data before me, and I think, hmm, what
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does this mean?
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How do we interpret this one?
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What do we say about it?
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And to start to think, okay, where does it fit in the big picture of the literature?
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And you know, oh my goodness, you know, people have been writing papers for a long time.
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There's a lot of stuff that's accumulated over time.
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It's a lot.
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And so when you write a manuscript, or even when you're, you know, writing the introduction
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to your grant and you're trying to situate your work within the context of other people's
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work, it's a big, big deal.
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And you really have to like step back and expand your mind to grab it all.
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And then you can't even do that.
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It's so big.
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And so it is such a powerful thing to think big and to think, okay, well, what's possible
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here?
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Based on this data, what's possible?
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And even to think big about, can I solve this problem of early TTP diagnosis?
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Can I be the one to do that?
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How would I do that?
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It is so wonderful to be able to think big.
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It just transforms you.
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It just, you know, takes you out of your mind.
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It's like, whoa, this is so good.
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Yes.
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Big picture thinking is gift number six.
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Gift number seven.
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Gift number seven is creating the future.
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I love the fact that when I'm writing my research proposals, and this is not thinking about
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whether they're going to be accepted or funded or not, it's that I have to create a future
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that does not yet exist on paper or in a Word document or pages, if that's what you use.
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Yes, I am creating the future as I write.
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And sometimes I'm creating the future and there's this sense of incredulity, like, hmm,
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this sounds fanciful, but I'm going to put it down anyway.
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Because what, you know, research proposals help you do is to take the big pie in the
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sky idea and just make it practical and concrete.
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It's like, great.
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I know that you're going to transform health care and tell me your approach.
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And then, you know, the reality check.
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It's like someone pours a bucket of cold water in your head and you have to, like, make it
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real.
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But you're writing the future.
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It's a future that hasn't happened yet.
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And because you write it down and you think about the critical components of it, you're
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giving voice to a future that's going to come to pass because you dared to put it down on
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paper.
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That is incredible.
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And I hear some of you cynics saying, yeah, that's if it gets funded.
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And the truth is, no, it's not about whether it gets funded or not.
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It's about the fact that you dare to put an idea down on paper that you all of a sudden
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have now created space to bring to pass.
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Because the kinds of ideas that you work on, I hope you're working on ideas that you actually
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care about, are the kinds of ideas that are so exciting or should be.
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But I hope that's what you do, that the moment you commit it to paper or you commit it to
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a Word document, your mind starts to go to work thinking, how can we get this done?
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How can we get this done?
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And OK, so maybe the first funder doesn't fund you.
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Who else can fund you?
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And all of a sudden it activates within you a desire to see your work go all the way.
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And all of a sudden you become creative about how do we get this future that we just put
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down on paper?
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How do we get it to come to pass?
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And yes, maybe that means that you're submitting a couple of grants here and there and then
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you're piecemealing it and sending this piece off and that piece off doesn't matter.
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All that matters is that you've created a future with your mind.
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And all of a sudden you want to see it come to pass.
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It is so amazing.
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It's so good.
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I really enjoy that.
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I enjoy sitting down and just thinking, wow, I'm creating a future that does not yet exist.
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It's a beautiful thing.
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And so, yeah, six months later, somebody may come back around and say, rejected.
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Ha ha, not discussed.
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And yeah, that's painful, but they cannot take away.
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They cannot take away the fact that you've already birthed.
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You birthed something amazing and they cannot take away the fact that whatever you birthed
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is already taking root in your mind and you're already thinking about how do I bring it to
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pass whether they fund me or not.
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And so creating the future is gift number seven of your research career.
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So I just told you about seven gifts.
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Number one is intellectual freedom.
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Number two is flexibility.
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Number three is impact.
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Number four is mentorship.
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Number five is collaboration synergy.
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Number six is big picture thinking.
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And number seven is creating the future.
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And I tell you, these are amazing gifts.
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These are amazing gifts.
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And I invite you, I invite you to think about your research career.
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Think about the gifts that you already have from your career.
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I only told you seven.
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There's so much more.
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What are some of those gifts?
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Now I want to invite you to make a list today of all the gifts that have come to you from
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your research career.
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Or maybe you don't yet have a research career.
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You're imagining one.
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You're dreaming of one.
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What are the gifts that you hope your research career will give you beyond the ones that
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I've already said?
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Write them down and share some of them with me.
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Come find me.
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Come find me on Instagram.
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00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:30,360
Find me on Facebook.
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00:28:30,360 --> 00:28:36,000
Find me on LinkedIn and share the gifts that you either already have or you're expecting
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from your research program.
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I would love to hear them.
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00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:44,160
Better still, leave me a voicemail on the podcast voicemail.
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00:28:44,160 --> 00:28:47,000
That's clinicianresearcherpodcast.com.
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00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:51,560
And then leave me a podcast voicemail and I will incorporate your podcast, I mean your
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voicemail into a future episode.
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I have to tell you that it's been a pleasure to talk with you today.
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That was so fun telling you about the gifts of my research career.
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I want to go now and create so many more of those gifts.
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And I hope you do too.
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Thanks for taking the time to listen.
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It's been a pleasure to talk with you today.
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Have a great, great day.
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00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:25,840
Thanks for listening to this episode of the Clinician Researcher Podcast, where academic
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clinicians learn the skills to build their own research program, whether or not they
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have a mentor.
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If you found the information in this episode to be helpful, don't keep it all to yourself.
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00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,440
Someone else needs to hear it.
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00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:44,520
So take a minute right now and share it.
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As you share this episode, you become part of our mission to help launch a new generation
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of clinician researchers who make transformative discoveries that change the way we do healthcare.